Uncategorized
But I’ve Never Even Tasted Malört…
Nick and I really really really don’t want any more babies. Actually I don’t want any more babies. Ask Nick and he will say, “The sky’s the limit!” And, “Hey, somebody’s gotta pay my Social Security”. He’s a two-trick pony…
I’m Goin’ to Coronado in My Mind
We just got home from our summer pilgrimage to Coronado. I love the first morning walk to the beach every year. I can never shake the feeling that we were JUST HERE… even though it’s been 12 months. I notice…
The Self-Esteem of a Confidence Queen
Over the next month, every single room in my house needs to be emptied, painted and/or carpeted, and then reloaded. Between replacing all of the original carpets and painting every common room, there are only about 500 square feet of…
I’ll Take “Hobbies” for 500, Alex.
A few years back at a mom’s night out, I stood by and listened as the group caught each other up on The Crown. Or some show like that – I’m not really sure what it was. I only turn…
All I Want for Christmas is Bleach
My favorite part of Halloween is when the kids are dumping out their candy after a successful night of trick or treating, and I get to put Mariah Carey on full blast over the sound system. Christmas cheer starts the…
The Social Media Sweep
A few months back I received one of my favorite compliments ever when a friend asked, “I don’t want to be too forward, but I’m so curious. I love your blog. How much do you make writing for it?” Compliment…
Why You Gotta Be So Rude?
Any friends who have been victimized by my foot-in-mouth disease know that my sarcasm frequently topples over into asshole-ism. Just last week I was dissing barrel leg jeans to my girlfriends. These jeans make our butts look flat and legs…
Aging Gratefully
Last week as I stood in front of the mirror in a crop top and brand new jeans, my seamstress kneeled down next to Maisy and ecstatically squealed “Baby girl, you have such a sexy grandma!” What a weird thing…
Did Jesus Have a Timeout Chair, Too?
How often have I rocked babies to sleep at 1 AM… 3 AM… 4 AM… and found comfort in wondering, “did Jesus wake up Mary all night long, too? Did she also hum delirious lullabies and pray longingly for sleep?”…
When Nick’s Away the Ghosts Will Play
I don’t believe in ghosts. This is 50% a faith thing – I think we are incapable of comprehending God’s forgiveness. He wants nothing more than to pull all of us into Heaven. And I think that when you finally…